I stand and I see MIST!! As I turn It is surrounding me, even above me and below. It has weight and mass, it is tangible, it exists it is REAL. Am I alone? Are there others in the MIST I just cannot see or hear or be aware of? Strange I feel no disorientation or spinning....I am just standing still listening to the quiet of nothing and everything. Am I lost, do I have no goal no direction to go? Is this peace? Or is it nothingness of my mind and soul?
WHERE is this? WHAT is this place? WHO am I here or am I even a Who? WHEN is there time here or none?
I have studied hard, and worked hard, I have walked the path, up the mountain over around under and through the obstacles. I have twisted my mind to wrap it around ideas and thoughts totally foreign to me. Then found myself at a doorway of white, white what???? After questioning, reasoning, stalling, fearing and there being NO answer, I go thru it...SOLID WHITE MIST
Somewhere along the way, you and the Creator/ONE sit down and have a serious heart to heart about the path you are on. You can always quit, there is freewill. But for some of us we make a commitment, we swear our love and devotion to the ONE, and make our commitment. Some of us do this several times throughout the millineiums...for us there is no quitting, we do the ONE's bidding, go where we are sent, without question, without thought of our person.
Something has to be done, and someone has to do it. I asked an old Lakota Shaman, what do you do when you are sick and tired. He said you pull yourself up by your bootstraps and get yourself out there, people need you.
I know this makes Absolutely NO sense for an lightone on the path....DEATH, to grieve, my face bathed in tears, my mind screaming, my soul realling... at the passing of chosen family and family. I know the words. I undestand the ways. I KNOW how it is......I KNOW to the depths of my soul!! Death of the ailing and old, sudden expected death of mid life, death of a sick child, death of an unborn child, death of Sisters of the Soul. Death and more death....
But tht is this lifetimes struggle for me to overcome my humaness of loss, and remember that the MIST is REAL; not this lifetime. To know that Love of here and there that counts. Not the fear of human DEATH and all the obscene nightmares that can come with it.
To realize that it is SPIRITUAL TRANSITION to go with serenity, courage, wisdom, be of comfort till my PEACE again in the light of the ONE To rest, understand, comptemplate and again become take on form, and love some more.
